Emperor Concerto, 22 October 2005, Barbican Hall (Emmanuel Ax, BBC Symphony Orchestra)

Fragmented thoughts. I've always loved Beethoven's Emperor Concerto, of course (who doesn't?!) and wish I have time to make this more coherent, but, well, with this and that, I don't exactly have much leisure. But as long as they serve to stir up memories......:

1. There is nothing...like the (oxymoronically) gentle cacophony of an orchestra warming up, each playing in their own little world, in the minute or so before they fall into an amorphous silence for tuning. And then the uncertain placement of the vaguely synchronised "A" chord, and then the anticipation, and the applause for the lead violinist, the conductor, and then... the music......

2. I was 2 rows away from the stage, right in front of the pianist. While he played, I could hear him humming to himself in a most Jarrett-esque manner (though he did not kick the piano, but pedalled most gracefully). And I remember thinking to myself, how many of us sing while we work?

3. Ax was strangely (if possible) more lyrical in the first movement than the second, which in retrospect seems almost impossible. But then, listening to his performance, I realised that, for all the gusto and bravado of the Allegro tempo, like the human soul there are moments, too, of insecurity (the accaciatura phrases), darkness (the modulations into the minor key), vulnerability (the arpeggios), sometimes almost heartbreak......

4. There must be few things more ethereal than that suspension before the appogiatura in the second movement, hanging for one breathless moment on the most delicate of threads, before floating away into the high B-flat.

What an evening! Without question one of the most beautiful performances I have ever heard. Bravo, bravo, bravo.